A Flood of Emotions

It seems like it was yesterday that I was posting we had two weeks until our trip; now we have less than two days! Between moving, basketball games, snow days and sickness, the time has flown by and we leave in about 40 hours.
The good news is that the move went great. Thanks to help from some incredible family members, we managed to move all of our big furniture on Saturday morning and I had most of our boxes unpacked by Sunday morning. We've settled in and the new house is already starting to feel like home. I am amazed at how well the kids handled the transition too. The boys were so excited about it, and many of their best friends (and cousins) live nearby so they were already familiar with the neighborhood. I was very concerned with how HD was going to take the change. We moved when Chipmunk was right around the same age as HD and he had a very difficult time for the first month or so. HD was a little apprehensive for the first few hours but she quickly found her favorite toys in the playroom and she hasn't looked back since. I think it helped that I had her room set up almost exactly like her old one so there was some familiarity there.
I was hoping that I would be able to focus on getting ready for our travels this week. No such luck. Between snow cancelling two days of school, waiting for the TV guys, Internet guys, and Josie having croup, I got absolutely nothing accomplished this week. We did have a LOT of mommy-and-kids time which is always a good thing.
So now it's Sunday afternoon and I need to start packing. But as I sit here and pack clothes for Pudding, I get lost in my thoughts of the coming weeks. While I am SO, SO, SO excited about finally meeting our little guy, I can't help but think about what a monumental change is about to happen in his life and how scary it is going to be for him. Stu and I know that this is a good thing, but all Pudding will know is that we are strangers that look different, talk different and smell different. We will be taking him away from everything he has known in his life. Even if the caretakers have tried to prepare him, there is no way you can explain the concept of a family to a 2.5-year-old. While I'm hoping and praying for a smooth transition full of hugs and smiles, the reality might be far different. I'm prepared for that (as much as possible). It just breaks my heart to think of the fear and hurt that Pudding is going to experience.
And then there is the fact that Stu and I will both be gone for 18 days. I know that my children will be very well taken care of (to the point of being spoiled) by family members, but 18 days is a long time to be away from my children. While two weeks of traveling to Kyrgyzstan for HD by myself was not ideal, I took great comfort in the fact that Stu was home and my kids had one parent with them. I have to keep reminding myself that this one-on-one time with Pudding will be a great start towards bonding and attachment. I have been joking that just having one child to handle will be a vacation for Stu and me but I know that I'm going to miss my kids tremendously. We will by skyping with them daily (we hope), but I'm not sure how HD will do with that. It might make her separation anxiety worse; I guess we'll play it by ear.
I still can't believe that we are so close. It seems like years ago that we saw his picture and now we are three days away from having him in our arms!! Yes, I did say three days: we leave here early Tuesday morning, arrive in Beijing late, late Wednesday night, and receive Pudding early Thursday morning. Not sure how I'm going to handle that as I am a notoriously bad traveler. I don't mind traveling (Stu might disagree with that point) but it completely knocks my body off kilter. I tend to sleep the entire first day we arrive at our destination; I'm not talking about a light catnap, I'm talking a dead-to-the-world sleep for the first 24 hours. Guess that won't be happening on this trip. Now you are prepared if I happen to look like a zombie in the first pictures we post. Speaking of which, my sweet sister-in-law has volunteered to add my posts to the blog while I'm gone so I hope to have daily updates here, with pictures too. I can't wait for everyone to see how adorable our little Pudding is! Thanks to everyone for all of the support, prayers and good wishes. I can't believe it's finally time...after I finish packing, of course.